You Don't Always Get What You Give

by Sasha Geha (@Nerd_til_death)
The puffy eyes, the tear stained tissues, the "please don't bother me today", accompanied by the "I just don't want to talk about it". Why? Because you know what needs to be done. You've said it to yourself. It didn't take your best friend telling you he's not worth your time. Truth is, he's worth every minute you have to spare. It's what you want, but only because you can't have it. You can have the love when he's with you, but you know it's always momentary. You know it's not real. He's taking what he knows he can get without trying. You know he's with two handfuls of other ladies who are thinking the same thing as you: "He loves me! He's here with me, so he loves ME, right?" Every thing you say to yourself starts with "I know that..." and ends with "...but". So you make excuses. Why? Because it's better to have half the love, than to know it's given to someone else. It kills you to know that. So, you put up with it. You know it's fake, and you just don't care.
What you put out into the universe is what you get out of it. I once told my friend: "I'm never going to find the right guy". She replied with, "you're right". No one has ever agreed with me on that before. I was a little taken back. But, she continued with: "If you're going to keep telling yourself that, it's exactly what you're going to get. As long as you tell yourself, the right man is being prepared for me. He's getting his stuff done so when it comes time for me, he'll have what it takes, it'll never actually happen". I took that thought and ran with it. Why am I sitting here caring about someone who cares about too many others. What's he preparing himself for? When I prove that I've got what it takes, the right man is going to find it; there's no doubt about that. The perfect man isn't going to be given some trash. So, it goes back to, why am I holding onto nothing? I'm trying to prove to this guy that I've got what it takes. You aren't going to get that "happily ever after ending" if you settle with half of what you really want. If he isn't giving me his all now, what makes me think he will later? That's when I realized, it's time to get me right. A woman that cherishes herself will get a man that will make sure to protect her. It's your world, do what you please with it. Just remember, you only get what you settle for.